Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering Gods grace in its various forms.

1 Peter 4:9-10

Friday, December 5, 2008

Small Victories

I've been making some progress with the wild man's behavior. Not sure how long it's going to last but I plan on sticking with it. I know he's only testing his boundaries and I also know I've been reacting very badly. So I decided to try something new. I'm monitoring my behavior. If I react badly to the wild man's negative behavior he escalates. Spanking his hands doesn't work fact, it's only teaching him that it's ok to hit - which of course it isn't. Two negatives DO NOT make a positive! I know most of you are thinking this is all common sense and maybe it is. Trust me, it's not a natural thing for me. My mother's been gone for 15 years so I don't get any kind of feedback. And, since having children was never part of my game plan, I've had many years to become comfortably selfish. So, believe me when I say that this is extremely difficult for me. I need to be conscious every minute of what I'm projecting to my son. To be frank, I'm exhausted. The good news is it is working! Instead of seeing Mumma fly off the hook every time he misbehaves, he's seeing Mumma calmly advising his consequences of bad behavior and actually following through without reiterating or negotiating. He screams and won't stop, his favorite toy is removed from the room for a while. If he continues, more toys disappear until he realizes Mumma is serious about using his indoor voice. I have to say, I've nearly cleaned out his toy box today. But by the end of the morning he had earned two of his toys back by listening and doing the first time I ask instead of the third time. It has been confusing for him yet more pleasant for me. He's been calmer and nicer. We even had a long period of time where we played together and laughed and had lots of fun! It's been a while since we've had much fun together. I was WAY too demanding and not thinking about how my behavior was influencing his. I have a lot of work ahead of me but I'm not going to give up. I want to have fun and snuggle time with my son again. I think I'm on the right track. Like I said, this may seem like a "duh" point with most of you and again, maybe it is. What can I say? I had 12 years with my husband when it was just the two of us and I was perfectly happy. Selfishness is very hard to suppress. The crux of the matter is that he is now more important than anything else in the world and I need to show him that Mumma really can focus on him even when I feel I'm being lured away. Pray for me, people!!! I really need all the help I can get! Pray for patience, tolerance, generosity, calmness and all those things that make a Mom a really good Mom.

Peace and, as always, happy knitting!!!

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Books on Tap for 2011

  • Knit Together - Debbie Macomber
  • Captured by Grace - Dr. David Jeremiah
  • Murder Most Foul - A Collection of Great Crime Stories
  • Fireproof - Eric Wilson
  • There's Something About Christmas - Debbie Macomber
  • Questioning Evangelism - Randy Newman
  • Murder Uncorked - Michele Scott
  • A Sacred Sorrow - Michael Card
  • Prayer: Does it Make any Difference? - Philip Yancey
  • Get Out of That Pit - Beth Moore

Books Read in 2011

  • What a Sista Should Do - Tiffany L. Warren
  • 90 Minutes in Heaven - Don Piper
  • Forgotten God - Francis Chan
  • The Purpose Driven Life - Rick Warren
  • Dead Reckoning - Charlaine Harris
  • Shadowfever - Karen Marie Moning
  • Chill Factor - Sandra Brown
  • Heaven Has a Blue Carpet - Sharon Niedzinski
  • Dreamfever - Karen Marie Moning
  • Wednesday Sisters - Meg Waite Clayton
  • Stealing Home - Sherryl Woods
  • Bound for Murder - Laura Childs
  • Bloodfever - Karen Marie Moning
  • Faefever - Karen Marie Moning
  • Darkfever - Karen Marie Moning
  • Under Her Skin - Susan Mallery
  • The Red Pyramid - Rick Riordan
  • No Wonder They Call Him Saviour - Max Lucado
  • I Still Dream About You - Fannie Flagg
  • I Am Number Four - Pittacus Lore
  • The Last Olympian - Rick Riordan
  • Spider Bones - Kathy Reichs
  • A Thread So Thin - Marie Bostwick
  • The Battle of the Labyrinth - Rick Riordan
  • The Search - Nora Roberts
  • The Titan's Curse - Rick Riordan
  • Wicked Appetite - Janet Evanovich
  • The Sea of Monsters - Rick Riordan
  • Awakened - PC & Kristen Cast
  • The Lightning Thief - Rick Riordan
  • Photo Finished - Larua Childs
  • Keepsake Crimes - Laura Childs
  • Sizzling Sixteen - Janet Evanovich
  • The Icing on the Cupcake - Jennifer Ross
  • Fleece Navidad - Maggie Sefton
  • Dyer Consequences - Maggie Sefton
  • The Darling Dahlias and the Cucumber Tree - Susan Wittig Albert
  • Heaven Has a Blue Carpet - Sharon Niedzinski
  • Dreamfever - Karen Marie Moning

Books Read in 2010

  • The Yada Yado Prayer Group - Netta Jackson
  • Silver Borne - Patricia Briggs
  • The Hole in Our Gospel - Richard Stearns
  • A Winter Marriage - Kerry Hardie
  • So Long, Insecurity - Beth Moore
  • Knit the Season - Kate Jacobs
  • Dead and Berried - Karen MacInerney
  • Murder on the Rocks - Karen MacInerney
  • where do i go - Netta Jackson
  • be sweet - diane hunt
  • The Lost Symbol - Dan Brown
  • Raven - Allison Van Deipen
  • Push (Precious) - sapphire
  • Faces of the Gone - Brad Parks
  • The Lace Reader - Brunonia Barry
  • Burning Lamp - Amanda Quick
  • Fired Up - Jayne Ann Krentz
  • The School of Essential Ingredients - Erica Bauermeister
  • Matters Arising - Sarah Harrison
  • The Sheen on the Silk - Anne Perry
  • I Saw the Lord - Anne Graham Lotz
  • The Dangerous Protector - Janet Chapman
  • The Seduction of His Wife - Janet Chapman
  • Re-reading all the Tintin graphic novels - Herge
  • The Sugar Queen - Sarah Addison Allen
  • the last time i saw you - Elizabeth Berg
  • Garden Spells - Sarah Addison Allen
  • Wild Ride - Jennifer Crusie & Bob Mayer
  • Dead in the Family - Charlaine Harris
  • The Girl Who Chased the Moon - Sarah Addison Allen
  • Grave Secret - Charlaine Harris
  • Crawl Space - Sarah Graves
  • The Honey Thief - Elizabeth Graver
  • The Otherworldlies - Jennifer Anne Kogler
  • Saving CeeCee Honeycutt - Beth Hoffman
  • A Face at the Window - Sarah Graves
  • Draycott Eternal - Christina Skye
  • Shelter Mountain - Robin Carr
  • Virgin River - Robyn Carr
  • Death by Cashmere - Sally Goldenbaum
  • An Ice Cold Grave - Charlaine Harris
  • Grave Surprise - Charlaine Harris
  • Grave Sight - Charlaine Harris