Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering Gods grace in its various forms.

1 Peter 4:9-10

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

In Memorium...

The last week has have been rough for our family. I know you've all read about my FIL's battle with diabetes and how his health had been rapidly deteriorating. He passed away on Saturday, a decision of his own choosing. It was probably the last thing he had any control over. After suffering through many indignities associated with his different diseases, he decided to not continue his dialysis. He was no longer able to sit still through a session, was in pain all the time and felt that no one was listening to him or paying attention to his needs. He needed new, expensive medications, new glasses, new hearing aids and a lot of other things. He felt he was no longer able to maintain a status quo and that he was not going to ever feel good again. Quite frankly, he was sick and tired of being sick and tired. He had lived with dialysis for over 6 years, battled with heart disease for even longer and felt he didn't have any fight left.

Once the decision was made, and they made sure it was truly what he wanted, the powers that be moved him to the Gosnell Memorial Hospice House in Scarborough on Wednesday. (An absolutely wonderful facility). He had his last meal that night, lobsters drenched in butter and lemons, and he had his last conversations with family. Everyone got a chance to say goodbye because we knew he would slip into stage 2 sooner rather than later. Thursday he slept off and on and was very sluggish. He didn't stay awake longer than 5 or 10 minutes at the most and was no longer capable of eating or drinking. He slipped into stage 2 that night. Friday he continued to sleep, fitfully. He was restless but the nurses assured us he was in no pain. I noticed when I left Friday night that his breathing was very labored and figured he would pass late that night or the next morning. He passed away at 10:25am Saturday morning, February 28th, 2009, with his family by his side.

Though he was a difficult man even when healthy and was nearly impossible when sick, we still loved him very much. He had many faults, which he admitted to, but at his request (that we remember the good times) this is what I choose to remember of him... He loved his family, he loved to fish and play cribbage and cards, he had an incredible work ethic, he was loyal, passionate and very, very intelligent. He loved his computers and over the last 10 years became quite good at them, making them a hobby he could fiddle with even when he became housebound. He was a very talented handyman and could fix nearly anything that broke down or build anything he set his mind to. Nothing he ever had a hand in making will ever fall apart! One of his favorite sayings was, "Why use a nail when you can use a screw?" I swear, our first house will rot away before it ever falls down! He always encouraged us and made sure his family would fight for what they believed in. One could disagree with him on something, but one must always be respectful about it. He was fond of telling my husband, "When I'm right, I'm right and when I'm wrong, I'm still right...because I am your father." He was, without a doubt, a force of nature.

I didn't like him a lot of the time, found him to be a pain in the butt most of the time, but I always loved him because he was my father-in-law. I know this isn't a glowing eulogy but it's not meant to be. What is important is he was loved. Rest in peace, Dad.


  1. First, thanks for stopping by my blog. Hope to see you there again. And thank you for commenting. It's nice when I see new ones. :)

    I am sorry to hear about your family's loss. I too have been remembering a loss from 6 yrs. ago. It still hurts. It doesn't matter if the person was difficult or not, they are still a part of you and they are missed. Even though they were difficult at times, they still had a lovely soul that touched you some how and did not let go. All you and your family can do is remember the good times and enjoy each day that is given to you.



Books on Tap for 2011

  • Knit Together - Debbie Macomber
  • Captured by Grace - Dr. David Jeremiah
  • Murder Most Foul - A Collection of Great Crime Stories
  • Fireproof - Eric Wilson
  • There's Something About Christmas - Debbie Macomber
  • Questioning Evangelism - Randy Newman
  • Murder Uncorked - Michele Scott
  • A Sacred Sorrow - Michael Card
  • Prayer: Does it Make any Difference? - Philip Yancey
  • Get Out of That Pit - Beth Moore

Books Read in 2011

  • What a Sista Should Do - Tiffany L. Warren
  • 90 Minutes in Heaven - Don Piper
  • Forgotten God - Francis Chan
  • The Purpose Driven Life - Rick Warren
  • Dead Reckoning - Charlaine Harris
  • Shadowfever - Karen Marie Moning
  • Chill Factor - Sandra Brown
  • Heaven Has a Blue Carpet - Sharon Niedzinski
  • Dreamfever - Karen Marie Moning
  • Wednesday Sisters - Meg Waite Clayton
  • Stealing Home - Sherryl Woods
  • Bound for Murder - Laura Childs
  • Bloodfever - Karen Marie Moning
  • Faefever - Karen Marie Moning
  • Darkfever - Karen Marie Moning
  • Under Her Skin - Susan Mallery
  • The Red Pyramid - Rick Riordan
  • No Wonder They Call Him Saviour - Max Lucado
  • I Still Dream About You - Fannie Flagg
  • I Am Number Four - Pittacus Lore
  • The Last Olympian - Rick Riordan
  • Spider Bones - Kathy Reichs
  • A Thread So Thin - Marie Bostwick
  • The Battle of the Labyrinth - Rick Riordan
  • The Search - Nora Roberts
  • The Titan's Curse - Rick Riordan
  • Wicked Appetite - Janet Evanovich
  • The Sea of Monsters - Rick Riordan
  • Awakened - PC & Kristen Cast
  • The Lightning Thief - Rick Riordan
  • Photo Finished - Larua Childs
  • Keepsake Crimes - Laura Childs
  • Sizzling Sixteen - Janet Evanovich
  • The Icing on the Cupcake - Jennifer Ross
  • Fleece Navidad - Maggie Sefton
  • Dyer Consequences - Maggie Sefton
  • The Darling Dahlias and the Cucumber Tree - Susan Wittig Albert
  • Heaven Has a Blue Carpet - Sharon Niedzinski
  • Dreamfever - Karen Marie Moning

Books Read in 2010

  • The Yada Yado Prayer Group - Netta Jackson
  • Silver Borne - Patricia Briggs
  • The Hole in Our Gospel - Richard Stearns
  • A Winter Marriage - Kerry Hardie
  • So Long, Insecurity - Beth Moore
  • Knit the Season - Kate Jacobs
  • Dead and Berried - Karen MacInerney
  • Murder on the Rocks - Karen MacInerney
  • where do i go - Netta Jackson
  • be sweet - diane hunt
  • The Lost Symbol - Dan Brown
  • Raven - Allison Van Deipen
  • Push (Precious) - sapphire
  • Faces of the Gone - Brad Parks
  • The Lace Reader - Brunonia Barry
  • Burning Lamp - Amanda Quick
  • Fired Up - Jayne Ann Krentz
  • The School of Essential Ingredients - Erica Bauermeister
  • Matters Arising - Sarah Harrison
  • The Sheen on the Silk - Anne Perry
  • I Saw the Lord - Anne Graham Lotz
  • The Dangerous Protector - Janet Chapman
  • The Seduction of His Wife - Janet Chapman
  • Re-reading all the Tintin graphic novels - Herge
  • The Sugar Queen - Sarah Addison Allen
  • the last time i saw you - Elizabeth Berg
  • Garden Spells - Sarah Addison Allen
  • Wild Ride - Jennifer Crusie & Bob Mayer
  • Dead in the Family - Charlaine Harris
  • The Girl Who Chased the Moon - Sarah Addison Allen
  • Grave Secret - Charlaine Harris
  • Crawl Space - Sarah Graves
  • The Honey Thief - Elizabeth Graver
  • The Otherworldlies - Jennifer Anne Kogler
  • Saving CeeCee Honeycutt - Beth Hoffman
  • A Face at the Window - Sarah Graves
  • Draycott Eternal - Christina Skye
  • Shelter Mountain - Robin Carr
  • Virgin River - Robyn Carr
  • Death by Cashmere - Sally Goldenbaum
  • An Ice Cold Grave - Charlaine Harris
  • Grave Surprise - Charlaine Harris
  • Grave Sight - Charlaine Harris